if you have love in your heart, let it show while you can

I've been going back and forth on whether I should say anything in response to the terrible shooting in Newtown, Connecticut this past Friday. It is still a raw subject, with so much political controversy and mixed opinions about how we as a society should handle this tragedy. It's been eating away at me though, and if I write something now, maybe I will better understand the whole situation.

This post isn't going to be about the morality of the situation, or the politics surrounding its reception, or the absolute horror that these people have experienced. No, I don't want to make this about what happened that was wrong. I want to tell the world what I think we should take from this awful event.

I cannot fathom how the community in Newtown is feeling right now, and I will not try to, because this is a very personal and emotional experience for all of them, and trying to empathize too much, I feel, would be like an intrusion on their privacy.

What I do know is how I felt when I saw the news article. My stomach dropped, and my heart stopped for a second. I was overcome by this sudden sadness and feeling of absolute hopelessness. Even now, I'm not entirely sure what to make of it. And I don't think we all need to know exactly what to think about this.

Some things are better left unanalyzed.

I have seen a lot of Facebook statuses and heard a lot of people talking about how this has made them really treasure what they have. And I think that is wonderful. Yes, this is a horrible event, but it has reminded us to cherish what we have.

I recently downloaded the new Avett Brothers album, The Carpenter, and have been listening to it sporadically all week. Friday afternoon, I was listening to one song that I had never really paid much attention to before. When I heard it, I listened to the lyrics for the first time, and I found myself in tears at how strongly this song relates to the shooting.

The song is called "Through My Prayers." As you can imagine, it talks about someone who has passed away. The narrator says that he and that person had been fighting right before the person died and now his only chance to talk to that person is through his prayers. The narrator feels regretful that he allowed the person to slip away without reconciling, even though he knows they loved each other. He warns the listener that "if you have love in your heart, let it show while you can."

The song itself is absolutely, heart-wrenchingly beautiful, but the thing that got me was that line. It hit me in that moment that this is what I was going to take away from this event. I don't think I have been as caring as I could be, lately. I've been busy and stressed out, which is fine and normal, but I haven't necessarily shown all the love that I can.

Whatever religion you are, you can at least see the meaning of this song, and I can't help but feel as if the timing of the shooting and my listening to the song are not a coincidence. Whatever the circumstances, we can all learn from what this song has to tell us.

Love each other. It's really that simple. Be it your family, your friends, your teachers, or even complete strangers like a bus driver or a waitress, just be kind. Show that you are thankful to have each other. Let people know you love them, that they are appreciated. And you don't have to do this just because you may not see the person again. That's not the point. the point is to live and love as fully and wholly as you can, because you will simply enjoy life more, and you may change the way someone else feels with that love.

So, as you go through this holiday season and see the Facebook debates and news coverage, please keep this song in the back of your mind. It may not heal the pain, but you might find something strong to hold onto in the lyrics. My thoughts and prayers are with Newtown, CT.

awful sweet to be a little butterfly

"Some days you are feeling good. Some days you are feeling bad. That's okay. It just means you are alive."

Wise words from my amazing ballet teacher, who, every now and then, will come up with one of these poignantly profound little 'isms that blow my mind. It's the simplest statement, really. Something that we all know and have heard some variation of our entire lives.

But something about the way my teacher said that really struck me. It sums up everything I've been trying to convey to the world for the past few months. This whole blog is about trying to get people to realize that they don't have to be perfect all the time. That we all have our ups and downs, and that there is always good that can come from the bad stuff.

Sometimes I just want someone to come up to me and say, "Hey. I know you're having a bad day. It'll be okay. This is what life is. This is how you grow. This is how you turn into the person you want to be."

This blog is my way of telling the world that it's okay to have bad times. My way of saying that you're allowed to be weak for a bit. I want to make sure people understand that there is always going to be something in your way, but you can get past it, with time and patience and in your own way.

I'm trying to remind you that you are human, so you're not always going to have the maximum energy and you're not always going to be rich and you're not always going to feel like you can make it any further. But the beauty of being human is that you are constantly changing, just like the rest of nature. Which means that you have a new opportunity every day to take on the world however you see fit that day.

I think I write to tell people what I wish I could hear sometimes. We all need support, whether we choose to admit it or not. Some of us are more willing to ask for help than others, and that's alright too.

So please, next time you feel like you've been knocked down or like no amount of sappy music and chocolate can make you feel better, think of the fact that you are human and you have the luxury of being alive in this crazy, hectic, insane, wonderful world.

turn on the 8-track

This week has been a little bit stressful, to say the least. Not just for me, but for everyone, it seems. Whether the stress is over school, work, or just life in general, I know that the world has been weighing pretty heavily on many shoulders this week.

I've realized, with the help of my EXTREMELY patient family and friends, that is you adapt the way you look at your situation, you will get a much better experience out of seemingly tough times. I think this is something I've always been told, but I never really took it to heart until this week. I was too set in my ways to see how true that philosophy really is.

I don't like admitting that I'm wrong, and I don't know anybody else who does. And that is part of the reason why I didn't really think about that idea until now. But looking at it with a truly open mind has allowed me to see that some of the attitudes I have about various things in my life are a lot more negative than they need to be. I need to accept that not everything will be perfect all the time, and that that's just the way life is so I have to deal with it by making the most out of what I'm given.

The same applies to everyone, really. Instead of pitying yourself for days on end, brooding over your "hopeless" situation, find some way to alter your perspective. Not to say that's easy, but you should at least consider a more positive spin.

It's absolutely fine to have a day or two when you feel horrible and have a petite pity party. It's normal, and it's healthy. BUT it's also important to not to allow yourself to sink into that pity until you believe there is no light whatsoever.

Because being miserable gets you no where. If you have the ability to adapt your attitude, you will be much better off in your life. You will be able to take more hardship and rebound with more ease. Going through life hating everything is just plain unhealthy, and no one wants to remember only the bad things.

You have to find the good moments. Pick through the rubble and find something shiny or sparkly that can lighten the situation for you. Find coping mechanisms that work for you. Take a hot bubble bath. Blast your favorite music. Call a friend. Get dressed up. Dance. There has got to be something out there to help you through. You just might have to search for it for a while.