There has been way too much strife in my little corner of the world this week. I am seeing disease, heartbreak, unnecessary stress, and some pretty devastating things happening to a lot of people in my community. I don't know if it's just that I am noticing it more because I am older, or if social media magnifies the troubles in the world, but I am seeing so much pain all around me.
And today I'm not talking about self-doubt or trouble with "finding yourself." This stuff is real. From death to cancer to breakups from long-term relationships. And it is tragic for everyone. All this strife in one little tiny town? It seems impossible. But it's not.
Suddenly, I am feeling such sympathy (and empathy) for people who I barely talk to. I am realizing how close-knit a community we are, and I am starting to see a side to some people that I wasn't sure existed. I don't really know what to say about this, except that I wish there was something I could do to make all this pain and fear go away.
I know that these are problems that must be fixed with time, and unfortunately some of these problems will only get worse. The saddest thing is that is how the world works. There is constantly loss and tragedy and grief, and yet this earth continues to turn and babies are still born and people still fall in love, all while tears are being shed only a few feet away.
I ask you all today to do a few things:
1) Be thankful for the people in your life and think about what they mean to you.
2) Tell them you love them. Please.
3) Extend support to anyone who may need it- whether they accept it or not, that empathy still means something
4) Think positive thoughts, and if you pray (or whatever your regimen may consist of) please keep these struggling people and families in your heart
There isn't really much else to say, and I think that you all understand what I'm trying to get at here. But PLEASE don't forget how precious your life and your health are, and how precious your family and friends are, if not for any reason other than to feel some love. Continue to laugh and live and love as passionately as you can, and you have nothing to fear.
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Saturday, January 26, 2013
be your own kind of perfect
"Look famous. Be legendary. Appear complex. Radiate presence. Travel light. Seem a dream. Prove real."
For some reason, these phrases have been floating around in my head all week. I saw them on a quotes website whilst searching for quotes about the Roaring '20s, and they just stuck with me. They ring so poignantly and are unconventional inspirational words.
You would never think to encourage someone by telling them to try and appear to be something on the outside that they might not be on the inside. When you initially read that, you think that it is bad because it appears to be about external features. After thinking about it though, I've realized that this is the quote I've been waiting to hear for the past 5 years of my life.
I am constantly saying how I hate it when people tell me to be confident. I feel that way because I have always thought of confidence as arrogance, for whatever reason. Everyone I knew who was supposedly "confident" I saw as bratty, self-absorbed, and condescending. I never once stopped to think that maybe I just hadn't seen REAL confidence in action.
I realize now that REAL confidence comes from loving yourself and being able to understand who you truly are and what you are capable of. REAL confidence is believing in yourself enough to put your talents out there. It is also having the modesty to humbly accept praise. REAL confidence is a balance between humanity and fearlessness, and I've never looked at it that way.
In my opinion, "Travel light" is another way of saying that you have to let some things go or that you have to be modest. If you let everything you are (or aren't) capable of go to your head, your ego will inflate (or deflate) so much that it becomes pointless to even try. You just have to let some things go. Acknowledge it and move on.
The other thing about this quote is that very last sentence: "Prove real." That is the key phrase that ties all of this together. All these things become arrogance or insecurity without that last piece. Someone who is truly confident may seem like a dream, but if they believe it themselves, no one can doubt them.
I feel like I am not doing a very good job of articulating how powerful this quote is for me. Before I rant on for another 5 pages, I would just like to tell you that as tacky as this blog is- and believe me, I am the queen of cliches- I truly believe in the things I write here. I feel like society today has turned positivity and inspiration into a laughing stock, a hippie-dippie sophism that could never actual help anyone improve themselves as a human being.
I believe the only problem with inspiration is that sometimes it gets repeated so much that it loses its meaning. We hear it so often that it becomes void, and then anyone who tries to say that is seen as just another silly dreamer who won't actually follow the words they are saying.
The only way to inspire anyone is to give them the tools they need to inspire themselves. We need to put our ideas into unique words that strike a chord or make people really think about the meaning of a quote. I believe what I write here with every bit of my being, and I share it here just in case someone discovers something for themself here.
I've learned how to find inspiration everywhere. I hope you can too.
For some reason, these phrases have been floating around in my head all week. I saw them on a quotes website whilst searching for quotes about the Roaring '20s, and they just stuck with me. They ring so poignantly and are unconventional inspirational words.
You would never think to encourage someone by telling them to try and appear to be something on the outside that they might not be on the inside. When you initially read that, you think that it is bad because it appears to be about external features. After thinking about it though, I've realized that this is the quote I've been waiting to hear for the past 5 years of my life.
I am constantly saying how I hate it when people tell me to be confident. I feel that way because I have always thought of confidence as arrogance, for whatever reason. Everyone I knew who was supposedly "confident" I saw as bratty, self-absorbed, and condescending. I never once stopped to think that maybe I just hadn't seen REAL confidence in action.
I realize now that REAL confidence comes from loving yourself and being able to understand who you truly are and what you are capable of. REAL confidence is believing in yourself enough to put your talents out there. It is also having the modesty to humbly accept praise. REAL confidence is a balance between humanity and fearlessness, and I've never looked at it that way.
In my opinion, "Travel light" is another way of saying that you have to let some things go or that you have to be modest. If you let everything you are (or aren't) capable of go to your head, your ego will inflate (or deflate) so much that it becomes pointless to even try. You just have to let some things go. Acknowledge it and move on.
The other thing about this quote is that very last sentence: "Prove real." That is the key phrase that ties all of this together. All these things become arrogance or insecurity without that last piece. Someone who is truly confident may seem like a dream, but if they believe it themselves, no one can doubt them.
I feel like I am not doing a very good job of articulating how powerful this quote is for me. Before I rant on for another 5 pages, I would just like to tell you that as tacky as this blog is- and believe me, I am the queen of cliches- I truly believe in the things I write here. I feel like society today has turned positivity and inspiration into a laughing stock, a hippie-dippie sophism that could never actual help anyone improve themselves as a human being.
I believe the only problem with inspiration is that sometimes it gets repeated so much that it loses its meaning. We hear it so often that it becomes void, and then anyone who tries to say that is seen as just another silly dreamer who won't actually follow the words they are saying.
The only way to inspire anyone is to give them the tools they need to inspire themselves. We need to put our ideas into unique words that strike a chord or make people really think about the meaning of a quote. I believe what I write here with every bit of my being, and I share it here just in case someone discovers something for themself here.
I've learned how to find inspiration everywhere. I hope you can too.
Sunday, January 13, 2013
trying to be someone that i can be proud of someday
I try not to make New Year's resolutions because I know I will never follow through and hate disappointing myself year after year. Just as a general rule, I think self-improvement shouldn't (doesn't) only happen when a new year kicks in. It's a constant process of editing yourself and adapting to life to become who you are meant to be.
That process involves changing how I think. I know, that sounds so difficult and highly time-consuming, but since I've set small goals for myself and tried to change how I feel about various situations, I've been achieving more.
My point is, if you go into a situation thinking that you are going to fail, you will. You have to believe in yourself before the rest of the world can. This week, I decided to be happier by way of never giving up and doing things the way I want to instead of trying to meet other people's expectations or guidelines.
Already, I feel so different, like I could do anything I wanted to and no one could stop me. It's not that I think other people know less than me or are trying to hold me down, I just realized that by doing things my way, I can get the same things accomplished and HAVE FUN while getting there.
I feel like I am able to laugh at myself more, instead of getting extremely frustrated when I have to try something for a second time. I am learning how to say no to my compulsive need for organization and control. I have a much easier time accepting spontaneity and rule-bending.
A very wise lady once told me that control is not freeing. You cannot have freedom or experience life to the fullest if you have control all the time. The way to change your attitude is to manage your stress. Eliminate things that bring you discomfort and do more of the things that bring you peace and solace. Of course, sometimes you just can't get rid of everything that brings you stress. So in those cases, you might just have to change the way you see your situation and make the most out of what you have.
My goal this year, and really for the rest of my life, is to live like this: in the moment, doing what I want to do, and loving what I have. I want to inspire myself and, hopefully, other people who come across me or my blog. I want the world to know that you don't have to be miserable and you don't have to be afraid of who you are because there is always a place for you. It just might not be where you are now.
I know this post has been kind of all over the place, but so is my mind right now. I've had all these thoughts and revelations this past month, and I want to share them all. This is the best way I have found to do that.
That process involves changing how I think. I know, that sounds so difficult and highly time-consuming, but since I've set small goals for myself and tried to change how I feel about various situations, I've been achieving more.
My point is, if you go into a situation thinking that you are going to fail, you will. You have to believe in yourself before the rest of the world can. This week, I decided to be happier by way of never giving up and doing things the way I want to instead of trying to meet other people's expectations or guidelines.
Already, I feel so different, like I could do anything I wanted to and no one could stop me. It's not that I think other people know less than me or are trying to hold me down, I just realized that by doing things my way, I can get the same things accomplished and HAVE FUN while getting there.
I feel like I am able to laugh at myself more, instead of getting extremely frustrated when I have to try something for a second time. I am learning how to say no to my compulsive need for organization and control. I have a much easier time accepting spontaneity and rule-bending.
A very wise lady once told me that control is not freeing. You cannot have freedom or experience life to the fullest if you have control all the time. The way to change your attitude is to manage your stress. Eliminate things that bring you discomfort and do more of the things that bring you peace and solace. Of course, sometimes you just can't get rid of everything that brings you stress. So in those cases, you might just have to change the way you see your situation and make the most out of what you have.
My goal this year, and really for the rest of my life, is to live like this: in the moment, doing what I want to do, and loving what I have. I want to inspire myself and, hopefully, other people who come across me or my blog. I want the world to know that you don't have to be miserable and you don't have to be afraid of who you are because there is always a place for you. It just might not be where you are now.
I know this post has been kind of all over the place, but so is my mind right now. I've had all these thoughts and revelations this past month, and I want to share them all. This is the best way I have found to do that.
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